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The BDSM Lies
by Jay Wiseman, Lady Green, Glen the Paramedic and Dale the Actress. (This "sanitized" version by GlitterOne)
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The Great Lies of BDSM (and a few others)...
...that we tell straight people:
- It's a fashion statement
- It's for a crafts project
- I fell off my bicycle
...that we tell each other:
- I've never even fantasized about doing that
- I just do this for fun. I don't need it
- Mistress, I'll do anything you want
...that we tell ourselves:
- I'm normal
- I always stop when I feel genuine anger
- I only play with people I respect
- I'm doing this for healthy reasons
...that dominant men tell submissive women:
- I think of women as equals
- I have a healthy relationship with my mother
- I truly believe that it takes a strong woman to submit
...that submissive women tell dominant men:
- I don't have any unresolved issues regarding my father
- It's enough to serve you, Master. I don't need to get off
- I really want you to be in charge
- I love it when you ejaculate in my mouth
- Licking your feet and bottom really turns me on
- I like your pot belly
- You own me body and soul
...that submissive men tell dominant women:
- I'll do anything you want
- I exist only to serve you
- I don't care about getting off
- I regard women as superior beings
- You're beautiful to me
- I really get off on doing housework for you
- My wife knows that I do this
...that dominant women tell submissive men:
- I basically like men
- Wearing high heels makes me feel more powerful
- I can't top anybody who doesn't turn me on
- I never switch
- I love giving golden showers
...that we tell vanilla prospective play partners:
- It's not pain. It's just strong sensation
- This is fundamentally a nurturing activity
- Submission is empowering
- You need to explore this side of yourself
...that dominant women tell each other:
- I have the perfect slave
- I feel that you and I are part of a Sisterhood
- I can stay in top space while I'm "receiving"
...that submissive women tell each other:
- My Master takes good care of me
- I'm not really an exhibitionist
- I don't feel competitive towards other submissives
- It's OK with me if you play with my Master
...that dominant, heterosexual men tell each other:
- My slave never says no to me
- Some of my best friends are submissive men
- When I watch you play at a party, I don't secretly hope that you'll screw up and everyone will notice
- I can still be dominant after I've had an orgasm
...that submissive, heterosexual men tell each other:
- The most important thing is to serve the Mistress
- I never tell her what to do
- I've never gone to a professional Mistress
- I love it when my Mistress won't let me come for days
- I don't think my Mistress is fat
- I don't mind that you can take more pain than I can
- I really believe that my mission in life is to serve women
- I really like going down on my Mistress during her period
...that bi switches tell each other:
- I truly don't care which gender I play with
- I'm not at all homophobic
- I separate sex from SM
- Being bi is the best of both worlds
- I only play with people I feel intimate with
- I only play with other switches
...that professional Mistresses tell each other:
- Business is good
- I never have sex with a client
- Business is bad
- I always stick to my specialty and refer out clients who want other things
- I'd do this even if I wasn't getting paid
- I never need to bottom
- I'm always in control of the session
- I'm a good businesswoman
- My lover doesn't mind that I do this
- It was my choice to leave my last straight job
And, finally, the three great lies that vanilla people tell SM people:
- Hearing about this doesn't shock me
- I know other people who are into this
- We negotiate everything too
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